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The Beliefs Paradox: Stop Yours From Limiting You

Updated: May 1, 2021


I'm Julia Brodska, As a holistic health coach speaker & author, I work with limiting beliefs every day. Let me start by saying everyone has beliefs (obviously). And we worship, fight for and sometimes sacrifice everything for our beliefs. Having beliefs is unavoidable and in most cases beneficial to the growth of humanity. However, we want to make sure we don't allow these to become self limiting beliefs. What I mean by this, is the beliefs that dictate our actions in a way that doesn't serve us, and determine how we live, if it isn't how we want to.

Unfortunately, everyone has had beliefs that limit them at some point in their lives. And there's no harm in having your own beliefs about things, as long as these beliefs don't hold you back. Life is much better when your beliefs work in your favor, not against you.

The list of common limiting beliefs is long, but what are limiting beliefs?

A belief is something you have accepted as true about yourself, someone else, or the world. More often than not a belief is an unproven assumption– even if heaps of people agree on it! It can never truly be proven. But it's totally normal to have beliefs and unknowingly let them limit us, because beliefs are just one of the ways that we process the flood of information we receive.

But let's dig a little deeper, and ask more questions to truly define limiting beliefs. One way to get control of your limiting beliefs, is to acknowledge them for exactly what they actually are: a false belief that keeps you from achieving your full potential and living the life you want. What you hold as true influences your perceptions, your character, your actions, your relationships, your health, and ultimately your happiness.

Some of the most common limiting beliefs are: I am too old, too fat, too thin, too dumb, I don’t have the willpower, the strength, the experience, the credentials, I’m not good with money, I don't have enough money, I don't have the resources, I don't know and I’m not worthy. You get the idea. These are all unproductive and negative beliefs. Imagine what you are missing by holding on to them.

Overcoming self-limiting beliefs begins with identifying your beliefs. What are you afraid of and what are your excuses? The questions you ask will determine the answers you receive.

Let’s say you want to start your own business, but you fear you might fail. Ask yourself why you are afraid. Why do you think you might fail? And most importantly, what's the worst that can happen?

What I've found is that almost all of my self limiting beliefs came from a place of fear. But what is there to really be afraid of? What is the worst that can happen? That's my favorite question! In most cases it could be you lose, money, feel a bit embarrassed, let a few people down, but so what? You'll feel a bit of emotion and then you can simply move on with your life. But the craziest part of all this is, that we allow ourselves to believe and focus on a problem that hasn't even happened. In fact, this is just an imaginary (literally) future. Chances are, most of what scares you probably won't even happen unless you continue to focus on it. And even if it did, the 'worst' that can happen, is survivable.

Before I could achieve my dreams, I had to overcome my own limiting beliefs. These were: I am stupid (because that's what the kids called me at school), I don't have enough money (in over $30k debt), not enough time (one of my favorite lies that I used to tell myself) and I don't know how (as if I couldn't Google it like everyone else).

Here's one way I learned to overcome limiting beliefs of my own, which later lead me to starting my first business, and publishing an international best selling book.

1. Write down your beliefs about time, love, money, family, and success.

2. Check out your list. Note whether your beliefs are factual or merely assumptions and whether the belief is helping or hurting you.

3. Next, replace each negative belief with a healthy productive one. For example, start saying to yourself I am capable of starting my own business, or I have plenty of time to pursue this goal, or I am intelligent and creative.

4. Make a list of what it would take to achieve your dreams. And in each step, notice when “I can’t because” pops up and you’ve identified a limiting belief. Whenever you feel stalled in your progress, go through this process.

5. Identify the labels people have put on you that you carry. Examine your childhood as many limiting beliefs start at an early age. Refuse to be a victim of these labels. Replace them with a positive description of yourself.

You have full control. You can choose what you believe in. For sure it's going to take time and practice, but as you consistently take on more positive beliefs, you will see the beneficial results in how you feel and you will start to manifest the people, places and circumstances into your life.

6. Visualize what you dream of. What you want. Spend at least 10 minutes each day in silence, opening to your subconscious mind and quieting the chatter of the conscious mind. This will help you stay focused and centered.

Take action steps each day to accomplish your goals. Action builds momentum that leads to success, and that empowers you and supports your new belief system. Each achievement grows your confidence and changes your beliefs. Believing that you can reach your destination in whatever you want to do, will propel you there.

By challenging my own beliefs, I learned to let negative beliefs go. Your perceptions can change, as did mine, just be patient with yourself. You're doing just fine (and then some!)

Lost track of your NY resolutions? It’s time to live your dreams. Find your power faster. Make 2021 the year your dreams become reality. Best Life-ing holistic health coaching may be exactly what you need to take your life on the journey you desire. Sign up for the challenge today and find your purpose.

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